The Ugly American - Baby, Come Back!

We are not ugly anymore.roses on the bedspread which did not match the
If you are inclined to being loud, rude, arrogantroses on the chair - but it was warm, with a big
and like to sight see on the elegant streets oftub and they served a full English breakfast
Europe in your sweats and running shoes, no oneincluded in the price. The underground stop was a
will sneer. They might even kiss you.block away. Don't ask me to remember the
The Americans are not traveling. And we arename but there are many like that in every
missed.major city. They do not spend money on
It's "the economy" of course but we are just notadvertising and may not have a web page. They
going anywhere. Not even out of our drivewayscater to European tourists.
to the mall.Some of these hotels have emails but they all will
It is true that the unemployment rate ishave a fax. Or call them up. It is not that
approaching eight percent but that also meansexpensive to call overseas these days. Be specific
that 92 % of us are working.about what your requirements are.
You have saved the money for your dream tripSomething like this:
and have hoarded your airline miles. You are afraidPlease reserve and confirm one room with two
to spend them.beds with a bath and TOILET for seven nights
The airlines have trillions of dollars tied up onbeginning ______ and ending __________.
those miles and I guarantee they are going toPlease advise availability, cost including all taxes,
make it harder and harder for you to use them inany meals included and deposit required. (They
the future. They are hoping you will die and yourcount nights not days. And I am not kidding about
family will not know they can have the milesasking for a toilet with the bath.)
transferred. But not right now. If you have a lotInquire politely about early check in as most
of miles, you can use them for hotels and carinternational flights from the US come in early in
rentals. Check into that. Try to book your flightsthe morning. Ask for detailed instructions by public
on line but sometimes you get better informationor other reasonable transportation from the
if you pay the fee to call the mileage people onairport to the hotel. Taxis are pricey.
the phone.End with your name and contact information.
I remember being on a Mediterranean cruiseThey will answer you. They are very efficient.
which was full of widows hanging over the railsEXCHANGE YOUR CURRENCY TO THE LOCAL
and crying, "How George would have enjoyed thisCURRENCY AT A BANK
trip." George was long gone.There are banks when you come to the airport.
I say. GO WITH GEORGE NOW. Or whomever.You will get a better exchange rate.
You are not getting any younger.AVOID USING CREDIT CARDS AS MUCH AS
You may have to make some adjustments inPOSSIBLE
your plans. That trip for three weeks to 17Sometimes, a store or a hotel will hold a charge
countries may have to be cut down to size. Mostuntil their currency improves over yours. You
people don't remember where they have been onmight be in for a big surprise months later.
a schedule like that anyway. They spend yearsBUY A WEEKLY PASS ON THEIR LOCAL
arguing if that picture of a church was in BrusselsTRANPORTATION SYSTEM
or Rome.Ask for a discount - senior, student - you might
Here are some suggestions to make it your tripeven get one if you are a teacher. Bring your ID.
recession guilt free.You can usually buy these at most airports so
TRAVEL IN LOW SEASONyou can get started right away. There is usually a
That means between November 1 to March 31.traveler's tourist desk in major airports if you
You do not go to Europe to swim. Everyonedon't know where to go to get these things.
wants to go when the weather is "nice." I ask(Also ask for a discount at all major sightseeing
you. When is that? The global warming issue issites)
messing up weather all over the world. Just go.AVOID RESTAURANTS WITH WHITE
GO TO JUST ONE CITY FOR A WEEKTABLECLOTHS
You can get a full flavor of a major city in thisThat's the signal they are more expensive. Or,
length of time and see almost everythinglook at the menu on the door. Do the math. Bring
worthwhile. Then come home and count youra little calculator with you.
pennies and your miles for the next one. Pick theLEAVE YOUR LAPTOP AT HOME (IF YOU CAN
city you have most yearned to see. Go thereBEAR IT)
first.Use Internet Cafes which are everywhere. I am
RESEARCH HOTELS YOURSELFgetting mixed answers about your using Skype.
There are many small hotels you can find if youBut bring your headset just in case.
do the work. And bed and breakfasts. Do not askDitto your hairdryer. Buy a cheap one there. I
your travel agent because they do not get ahave burned out several.
commission on them so they will not book them.HAVE A PICNIC TO SAVE ON MEALS
Do it yourself. Pick something just a little off theOCCASIONALLY
main drag. Not the suburbs. Make sure there isBuy a nice bottle of wine, some crusty bread and
public transportation nearby. There are plenty ofsome cheese and have a simple meal watching
travel books in the library. I have found that thatCNN in your room. You will need some rest after
is a better source than on line. Fodor's ora hard day touring.
Frommer is a good place to start.And I was just kidding about ugly. I think you are
I stayed in a very reasonable hotel in London rightbeautiful!
across from the British Museum. The room wasWhat did I miss? Attention: You savvy travelers!
small, the roses on the carpet did not match theAdd your suggestions!
roses on the wallpaper which did not match the